Helium Writers Tell Stories About Their Involvement w/CPS
Posted by Forever on May 17, 2008
I ran across a group of articles on Helium about CPS and what to do when they come knockin’… there’s no definitive answer, and having been through it, having the knowledge I have of the s
ystem and CPS, and even with all the cases I’ve seen, I don’t know how to tell you, this is what you should do. Every case is different and you should contact an attorney for the best personalized legal advice.
Being falsely accused is one of the worst nightmares a good parent can go through. It destroys lives. It kills…. (I’ve read several suicide reports after such family tragedies); most of all, it takes a child’s innocence and childhood from them. It forever changed my world, and it won’t ever be the same. Sometimes, like in my case, the children never come h ome. Its devastating. I’m still not over it, nor will I ever be. They destroyed me when I lost my boy…. I was a good mom falsely accused.
I couldn’t have prepared for it, when you’re falsely accused you don’t expect to be accused,and you don’t expect to be doubted by the state.If you’ve never dealt with them before, CPS is supposed to help families and until you see for yourself the flaws, there’s no way to believe how wrongly a good parent can be treated. I have faith in the merits of my case, in the system, and in the truth. I never expected my son wouldn’t come home. I knew I hadn’t abused him. However, my faith in the system was where I went wrong. Don’t take for granted it could happen to you. It can happen to anyone, and its the worst pain/nightmare a parent can imagine…. particularly when the child is injured, killed, or never comes home. No parent can prepare for that. Its a tragedy.
# 1 tip I tell parents is to TAPE RECORD EVERYTHING - EVERY VISIT, EVERY INTERACTION with the child, the CPS social workers, the front desk lady, even.TAPE EVERY meeting, phone call, etc., tape it all. Its value may not be realised until late in your case or even after your case is complete when you recall something that was said, or when something conflicts with something else, etc. Keep those tapes securely in a safe place, and make copies.
Other best advice I have - don’t take anything for granted, and kiss your babies twice every night that you put them to bed. Once for you, and once for all the parents who can’t kiss their kids goodnight.
Thank you to Helium.com and the writers for their contributions.
You can also see my articles on Helium here.
How to prepare if you are falsely reported for abuse or neglect
- by Dan Weaver October 4, 2004. I will remember that day for the rest of my life. For me, September 11, 2001 fades in comparison bec… read more
- by Catsy Jones I can remember the day quite clearly. I was sitting on the couch, my husband was packing our things for the move to o… read more
- by Frances Gordon I’ve had allot of experience with child Protection Services. A great deal of experience. The Departments vary a lit… read more
- by Shanna Coon No one expects to be falsely accused of child abuse or neglect; yet bogus cases are reported daily to Child Protectiv… read more
- by Sabrina Schleiger First of all, let me just say that if your child has any birth marks or blotches on his or her skin, be sure to tell … read more
View All Articles on: How to prepare if you are falsely reported for abuse or neglect
How to prepare if you are falsely reported for abuse or neglect
by Dan Weaver
October 4, 2004. I will remember that day for the rest of my life. For me, September 11, 2001 fades in comparison because October 4, 2004 was the day Child Protective Services (CPS) of Montgomery County, New York took my daughter away from me based on anonymous and false allegations. I finally got her back, but she would never have been taken in the first place if I had known more about how CPS and Family Court operated, and if I had known my rights under the law.
Don’t make the mistake of thinking that it can’t happen to you. Before it happened to me, I would have never thought it was possible. Although my wife and I were approaching age 50, neither of us had any experience with courts, lawyers or investigators of any kind. We had each received a couple of traffic tickets in our lives, which we dutifully pled guilty to and paid the fines. We had hired a lawyer twice for closings on house purchases. My wife had served on a jury once.
We had been married for 25 years, raised two boys who were model citizens, extremely bright and had never had any trouble with the law. We both worked. My wife graduated from community college with a 4.0 average and was a charge nurse at a local nursing home. I had an M.A. degree in English and ran my own business. We paid our taxes, went to church, helped our neighbors, voted in every election, put up the flag on holidays-in short we were the kind of people that supposedly were the backbone of America.
The number one piece of advice I can give people who have been falsely reported for abuse or neglect is to hire a good lawyer. (I am not a lawyer, by the way, so please don’t take any advice from this article without consulting a lawyer first.) But don’t just hire any lawyer. Your lawyer must be familiar with family law and social services law. He or she must also be aggressive. Child Protective caseworkers and social service lawyers are very aggressive, and they will run right over a mealy-mouthed lawyer. I know because it happened to the first lawyer we had.
Another mistake we made was cooperating with CPS. It’s just like cooperating with the police. It generally buys you nothing. When CPS investigators come to your door, you do not have to let them in the house, unless they have a search warrant. All of your constitutional rights are in force, and you need to maintain them.
Get the investigator’s name and business card if possible. Speak as little as possible and as politely as possible. Close the door as soon as you are able and contact your attorney right away.
Before closing the door, ask what the allegations are. CPS will not give you a copy of